Journal

I wish some things were different. Not all things, just a few. Like, I wish my mother hadn't moved to California, for instance. I miss her. I still need her from time to time. Dad tries, but... There's only so much a grown man can handle or understand of the mind of a teenaged woman. I don't blame him for that. It's just natural.

I wish Jason never went on his missionary trip for Haiti all those years ago. There was no way to know there was something wrong with the plane, I know, so it would have been selfish of me to ask him to stay. But if he hadn't gone... He'd still be with me.

He used to give me daisies every month, and laugh when the scent made me wiggle my nose. He used to take me to the park where my parents met and watch me dance in the sun. He would brush my hair out of my eyes and tell me something that he loved about me -- and each time it would be something different...

I used to trace his fingers with mine... Feeling amazed at how they could be calloused from work yet soft at the same time...
I used to lie beside him in the grass and listen to all the things he'd do someday...
I remember how the gold in his eyes would flicker with emotion when he talked about his ambitions...
It would also flicker every time he looked at me...

Not all of my wishes deal with me, though. I wish some things were different for my friends, too.

I wish Anna's fiance never cheated on her. She had gone through so much already... I'll never forget the way she looked at me when she found out. I'd never seen her so broken...

I wish Aaron could have found his mom before she died. He had wanted nothing but to meet the woman who loved him enough to give him a chance at life... despite the circumstances of his conception.

I don't want everything to be different, though. There are some things I'm glad are different. For instance, because Mom left, Dad quit drinking. He smiles more now, and laughs more now. I love our Thursday night card games... We never had that when Mom was here... There was only fighting.

I'm grateful Jason's sister found a way to cope through her paintings. The images and blends of colors that come from her have made her name famous throughout the world -- with every painting showing another piece of the love she had for her brother.

I'm happy that Aaron and Anna found each other. They were just what the other needed to go through their respective heartaches. It's like magic, seeing them together.

I'm grateful that not everything is different.


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I intended to write a personal blog entry into my Xanga but wrote this instead. I guess someone else needed to vent more than I did. I hope I can flesh out her character and find out who she is someday...

Please comment :)

With the Coming of Summer

Hello, again. Talk about a hiatus huh? I hope to bring this place back to normal, or semi-normal, posting again. But first I have to finish the first semester of my third year at college. Being a Creative Writing major means all my classes involve a heck of a lot of reading and writing.
It gets overwhelming writing for four classes at once. I think having a language class as my fifth course is the only thing that has kept me from spontaneously combusting on my laptop.
I just wanted to write something simple and give the glimmer of hope that this blog IS coming back -- as will my story ideas/excerpts. I'm currently working on getting the plot idea for a Inu/Kag fanfiction (one-shot) down but I'm also starting the process of developing ideas for a full fanfiction of the same pairing. If I manage to pull it off, let's just say, it'll be verrrryy interesting ;)

Also, I made a slight change in the side bar menu. I've seperated my pages from friends/pages I follow and added a link to my recently created formspring account. This will allow any and all of you to send me questions anonymously (or, if you have an account, you may choose to show who you are) and I will answer. It seemed like a fun way to kill boredom and stress and get to know my friends a little more intimately -- but then I realized it could mean the same to any and all readers I have here. :)
So if there's anything you'd like to know, feel free to ask: http://www.formspring.me/literarybug

I'm not sure if I'm going to continue posting my old writing assignments from my first Creative Writing class (refer to last couple of posts). So much time has already passed since then, and I was getting closer to the MUCH longer writings that I doubt I would have posted fully here anyway. Not to mention it would entail me digging through the travesty that is my room to find my old notebook xP
Yea I should really tidy things up a bit... But I digress.

OK! I think that's all the announcements I had to give. Oh, also (this just came to mind): Since I haven't been able to write out of pleasure for some time (thanks to my workload of term papers and reports) I might be a little rusty. If anyone happens to have a request for an excerpt--i.e. "Write about a cat that lost his yarn!" (weak example but just illustrating the process)--feel free to submit one here in the comments section. Remember that you don't HAVE to have a blogspot in order to comment on my page, simply choose the "anonymous" option and you will be able to submit a comment without having to log in or register--though feel free to leave your name somewhere in the comment so I can credit you when I write your story request :)

Alright. That's all she wrote, folks. See you soon.